It's My Due Date and I'll Cry If I Want To!!!
Ok, so actually Friday the 21st was my official due date, and I did cry that day. I am just feeling ok enough to even write this today:) Pregnancy is long. 40 weeks is very long. But over 40 weeks.....good grief. I am not one who has lots of patience in general, and this has been a very difficult past few days for me. Apparently this kiddo is very happy and comfortable just hanging out baking, with no desire to come out and see me! The trick is, I would very much like him to come out now:) I have gone through lots of emotional highs and lows the past week or two, from excitement, to anxiousness, to frustrated. Right now I am just plain worn out. I am tired. I am uncomfortable. I am moody. I am not in control of any of this and that is aggravating in and of itself. I don't really want to be induced, but we may be heading down that path in the next few days if he doesn't come on his own, just because of the time he has been in there in addition to his ever increasing size. I am really not sure what else to say. I have been doing tons of resting, napping daily, I have taken the past few weeks off of work, and am trying to enjoy spending my days with my family. The problem is that just daily life and activities are hard in the state I am in, and I get worn out so easily which really frustrates me. And I have a 2 year old ball of energy who I wish I could play with more, but it's just hard to right now. So that is where I am today. Still waiting, sometimes patiently, sometimes not so much. Some hours and days are great and I am distracted, other hours and days seem eternal and I can't do anything but try to will this thing out of me!! I have contractions all the time. I have them every 5 minutes for hours and they are getting increasingly painful, but as soon as I think I am ready to go to the hospital, sure enough they will die down or just go away for half the day. There is nothing left to do on my "to do list" because I had all that done weeks and even months ago, and now I have to resort to doing things that aren't really that important just to fill my time while I wait. And the waiting is so hard. I have loved this baby from the second I knew I was pregnant, and every minute that goes by that I can't hold him and smell him and look at him is killing me. I know I can't be pregnant forever, but it sure feels that way. Every day I get so excited that "this could be the day" and then nothing happens and I am so disappointed. I know that God has a plan and that little Jace will be born at exactly the minute he is supposed to be. I just wish I knew when that minute was!!! So for now I am still waiting. I appreciate all of your prayers and calls. Some days I just do better at handling the waiting than others. I am really hoping my next post will have some baby pictures in it! Please continue to pray for a relatively smooth labor and delivery for both me and Jace. I am feeling optimistic and hopeful today:) It just can't be that much longer, can it?!?!?
posted by Lauren at
7:52 AM
1 Comments:
Every day I check your blog just waiting to see that cute baby! You are in my prayers!
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