Monday Musings
This post really doesn't have too much of a point, except that I am bored and just wanted to get my thoughts out there. I have been in a weird place emotionally these past few months, and weeks especially. I know that it all has to do with the major life changes that are going on with us, but it can be very unsettling at times. Sometimes I go for weeks and don't think about things, and then there are days where I just get so overwhelmed emotionally I don't know what to do! It's just part of it I guess. I am just in that world where feelings collide and leave you feeling strange a lot. I am so incredibly excited about the house and getting this final move over with I can't stand it, but also feel such a deep sadness about leaving this town, friends, church, and the overall familiarity and comfort it has brought me for years. Searcy has been one of the few places I have felt at home, since we have moved around so much, and I am sad to leave this place. With things getting closer and closer, I feel like I am in that "one more time" phase. You know, the lets go out to eat at our favorite places one more time, lets get together with friends we haven't seen much lately one more time before we go, let's do this or that one more time. It's a hard place to be, that's for sure. I am such a sentimental sap anyway, so these moments in life are never easy for me. It was hard enough leaving my house behind a few months ago, but I know there are many more changes just around the corner. I have often explained it to Silas like this....I feel like I am riding a huge roller coaster and am going up and up and up that big hill at the beginning where you feel this impending dread at having to go over the top, but there is also that building anticipation of what is to come, and you want it to stop, but you want to keep going too. Well, life, like the roller coaster, is not going to stop, so I know that I am going to stay on the ride and have fun while I'm on there! It is just strange how all of these emotions can be so closely related. Basically I am just exhausted from riding the emotional train the last few months. So I say all of this just to get it out there and recognize that when I have tough days, this is where it is coming from. I can tell you this though, the day I move I am going to run that washer and dryer all day and night until I get my clothes caught back up!! The pile of dirty laundry building in the corner of our bedroom is threatening to take over the whole room and it totally freaks me out!!! I guess this has just been a time of growing for me and having to realize that I can't get it all done all the time.
Ok, so basically I said this to say, I'm caught in a world of conflicting emotions which can be exhausting at the least. If you are in Searcy, I would love to hang out, if not, prayers for peace during these changes would be greatly appreciated.
Ok, so basically I said this to say, I'm caught in a world of conflicting emotions which can be exhausting at the least. If you are in Searcy, I would love to hang out, if not, prayers for peace during these changes would be greatly appreciated.
posted by Lauren at
11:39 AM
5 Comments:
Oh Bar, I completely understand. Your feelings are completely justified. But remember, you will make a "home" in Jonesboro too, and I'm confident that God is preparing all the right people, opportunities, and circumstances for your family there. Change is so scary, but it makes us into different and better people. In the meantime, we'll be praying for a good transition. I love you!
I felt the same way when I left for college and when I left Jonesboro both times. We still miss Jonesboro so much and wish that we were still there, eventhough we are happy with the direction that God is leading our lives. We are human, so our lives are full of change. It is not really the changes that get us though. It is definitely the transitions. Once you make it through that period of transition, you can make Jonesboro your home. Enjoy the time that you have left in Searcy, but look to your new life in Jonesboro as a great opportunity and adventure! I am so excited for you!
OKay, so we have been sick. But, we're better now, so I want to hang out! :)
You are right, change brings about a roller coaster of emotions you never knew you had. And, like the others have said, change is scary and uncomfortable, but I know you and Silas will handle it with grace and coolness.
When you all finally make the move up to Jonesboro, enjoy it, because you will be the "New Kids On the Block" and everyone will want to get to know you, bring you food and shower you with attention. I think the best part of moving somewhere new is meeting new people and making new lifetime long friendships.
The three of you will make it through this rough patch of packing and unpacking, but it isn't for too much longer, and we will keep you in our prayers.
BTW, really excited to see you guys on Sunday!
I just wanted to thank everyone for the sweet sweet comments. I know this is just a season of life, and patience has never been one of my greatest virtues! Thank you so much for your sweet hearts and thoughts, prayers and encouragement at this time:)
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